it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
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tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
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I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
