She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
