THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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