Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize