also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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