Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize