why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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