Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize