My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize