She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
