she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
