Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize