Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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