Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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