Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm too high and old for this...
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
