Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
