dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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