I just made out with a guy for $7.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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