I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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