Pappa wants mamma naked
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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