Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
