absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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