Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
