well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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