Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
My feet surprised me
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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