thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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