I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
accomplished twins. life is a go
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me