My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
and you fell through a lawn chair