drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
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