I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Randomize
