Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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