ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
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next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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