Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
