Have you finally orgasmed yet?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize