you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
