She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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