It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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