Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
