you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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