Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize