Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
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she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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