just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
