she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
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you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
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You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
please don't ironically join a cult
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