hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize