is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
