oh god the rape fog is back!
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
