is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Randomize
