I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
