I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
