good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize