She said her name was "party"
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
