belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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